Part 5

November 26, 2024

2–3 minutes

Sara without an H > this collection: Peanu(t)s > Part 1 > Part 2 > Part 3 > Part 4 > Part 5 > Part 6 > Part 7 > Part 8 >> next collection: Pennies From Heaven

Peanu(t)s: Part 5

So, when exactly was this Charlie, when?
'Cause the timing's all-important,
Paradoxically it's Zen...

Did you pimp Lucille to him 
To stop him Turning Japanese?
I really think so Charlie... Schroeder 
Likes the girls with bruised up knees,

I think it must have been before
I told you what went very wrong,
I told her too and both of you
Sang self-same-preservation song,

Well, I think it's very kind of you
To boost his reputation,
Though it deffo gave him ideas
That are high above his station.

Still, I'm sure he's very grateful for you
Making him your pet,
'Cause you didn't merely set him up
With Lucy van dur Sket,

You provided him with back up,
Should his stamina run dry,
You got Shermy as a chaperone,
Oh Shermy! What a dapper guy!

I should point out: he's a player, I'm the coach,
Though I'd never ever fuck him,
So there's nothing to reproach,

Not on my side for example,
But there's certainly on yours,
'Cause he really, really hates you,
And gets off on fighting wars.

But the one he started with me
Didn't give him satisfaction,
Shermy's skirmishes were pointless,
'Cause my give-a-shit got lost in action,

He doesn't take the donkey dust,
He's still a braying ass,
All that braying on his playing,
Crying wolf with zero class... 

"He ain't heavy, he's your brother",
Shermy's secrecy's a shocker,
He's stockpiling jelly doughnuts,
Shove the onus in his locker,

Gee, I wonder where integrity and fortitude have gone?
Well, it's time to quickly saddle up and bravely solider on.
And until I can discover a descriptifying noun,
I would say that he's a "he-whore", Charlie Brown.


© Sara Nicola Ruth

Sara without an H > this collection: Peanu(t)s > Part 1 > Part 2 > Part 3 > Part 4 > Part 5 > Part 6 > Part 7 > Part 8 >> next collection: Pennies From Heaven

Big up

🥜 “Turning Japanese / I really think so” — direct quote from “Turning Japanese” (1980) by The Vapors, a song about obsessive masturbation, ‘turning Japanese’ referring to squinting one’s eyes during the act of onanism:

Turning Japanese, I think I'm 
Turning Japanese, I really think so,
I've got your picture, I've got your picture ,
I'd like a million of them all round my cell,
I want the doctor to take a picture,
So I can look at you from inside as well,
You've got me turning up and turning down,
And turning in and turning 'round...

🥜 “He ain’t heavy, he’s your brother” — referring to “He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother” by The Hollies:

So on we go,
His welfare is of my concern,
No burden is he to bear,
We'll get there, for I know,
He would not encumber me,
He ain't heavy, he's my brother

🥜 “He’s stockpiling jelly doughnuts, / Shove the onus in his locker,” — referring to Private ‘Gomer Pyle’ in Full Metal Jacket (1987) whose life started to unravel after a jelly doughnut was discovered in his footlocker.